It's not entirely about Aziraphale, no. Not by a long shot. Balthazar is thinking not only of Lucifer, but also his relationship with his own siblings, especially Castiel. If Aziraphale were to see them together, in fact, he might even become aware of some distinct behavioral parallels; Balthazar playing the role of banana man to Castiel's earnest and duty-bound straight man act. And what Balthazar knows about himself is that he has been in love with Castiel for centuries, but fully aware there was nothing to be done about that. Too straight laced, Castiel would never have gone in for a romance in Heaven, and now he's dead set on humanity as a whole, the Winchesters specifically, and one Winchester in particular.
His ego hates that he's lost to a human, of course, and he'd be lying if he claimed he wasn't hurt in a number of complex and multilayered ways, but even before meeting Lucifer at the fair he'd mostly accepted it. It wasn't the right time then, it isn't the right time now, and it was never going to be the right time.
The fault is not in our stars, but in ourselves.
He's finding someone he actually does fit with, now. Even if it's the absolute last angel he'd have expected to fit with, it's there and it feels right. He'd just like to spare both Aziraphale and Crowley some of the harder lessons he's learned, particularly since he's aware he's been lucky, damned lucky, to be caught by a loving devil when he fell from Grace.
"All right," he says with an oddly gentle smile. "I've said my bit. You do that, and keep what I've said in mind, and--however it is you love him, you make sure he knows it."
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branchandroot
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Date: 2019-10-28 05:18 pm (UTC)His ego hates that he's lost to a human, of course, and he'd be lying if he claimed he wasn't hurt in a number of complex and multilayered ways, but even before meeting Lucifer at the fair he'd mostly accepted it. It wasn't the right time then, it isn't the right time now, and it was never going to be the right time.
The fault is not in our stars, but in ourselves.
He's finding someone he actually does fit with, now. Even if it's the absolute last angel he'd have expected to fit with, it's there and it feels right. He'd just like to spare both Aziraphale and Crowley some of the harder lessons he's learned, particularly since he's aware he's been lucky, damned lucky, to be caught by a loving devil when he fell from Grace.
"All right," he says with an oddly gentle smile. "I've said my bit. You do that, and keep what I've said in mind, and--however it is you love him, you make sure he knows it."